Ranking My Top Ten (…and more) Films of 2014

2014 was a fair year for movies or films as I prefer to call them: it was a great year for sci-fi, be it action, thriller or adventure. In 2014 some expectations were met, few were surpassed; we had a few good as well as nasty surprises, and some were simply more of the same ol’ same ol’ fare. So I spent over a hundred hours (insert cringe) in front of a variety of screen sizes trying to catch up with the plethora of films across genres that came out this year.

Now as the year has come to an end I would like to present My Top Films of 2014 ranked in order. Please note that the films are those I actually watched, ranked according to my preferred scale of enjoyability/entertainment value, ability to captivate and overall plot theme. So let’s get right to it, shall we? J

1. Edge of Tomorrow
2. Captain America: The Winter Soldier
3. The Equalizer
4. Guardians of the Galaxy
5. The Maze Runner
6. Fury
7. The Giver
8. Locke
9. Interstellar
10. Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

Yes? Or no? Well before you lynch me, allow me to give a detailed run down (read: reason for ranking) of some of my Top Ten Films of 2014.

Edge of Tomorrow – every gamer’s wet dream.

Edge of Tomorrow blew my mind!!!!! This Groundhog Day-meets-First Person Shooter-action-sci-fi flick was a dream come true for me; it was akin to being given a gift of that one thing you didn’t know you needed until it was given to you. Based on the novel All You Need Is Kill by Hiroshi Sakurazaka, EOT which stars Tom Cruise and Emily Blunt is an intelligent, action-packed feast of a film. It was a jolly good ride and I was enthralled from start to finish. Sadly, despite love from the critics and viewers and although it more than doubled its $178m budget it did not make as much at the box office as I thought it would. This I have pencilled down to “Tom Cruise hate”. However, Tom Cruise’s performance was nothing short of stellar as I vicariously felt his terror, pain, frustration and bouts of hopelessness with each iteration/re-spawning of his character Major William Cage. Emily Blunt was bad ass as Sergeant Rita Vrataski in a performance that really surprised me.

Edge of Tomorrow also features Brandan Gleeson and Bill Paxton and is directed by Doug Liman.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

We follow Steve Rodgers as he tries to preserve his only link to the life that he knew in the form of his best friend Bucky Barnes now turned super-villain.

Captain America was probably the least loved Avenger in last year’s The Avengers, but Captain America: The Winter Soldier goes all out show why Captain America is fit to be their leader. The internal human conflict and dissonance that is absent in many of the Avengers characters’ movies is present. This is what makes Marvel characters more loveable than DC’s. Akin to today’s super spy films, The Winter Soldier is interspersed with humour, great dialogue and the awesomest action sequences. Hey if you’re still not convinced maybe you should re-watch Nick Fury’s truck chase scene! *Shrugs* That scene did it for me.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier grossed over $714m at the box office, making it the 5th highest grosser of 2014. 

The Equalizer

The Equalizer stars Denzel Washington as a bad ass. #Dazall.

Guardians of the Galaxy – the summer blockbuster epitomized

This was probably the most anticipated film of 2014. Some of us who thought that we were Marvel fans had to do a little extra research on these guys but hey what did we care? Disney had given us the incomparable The Avengers in 2013 and now they could do no wrong. Truth is you need not be a fan of Guardians to love this film. Writer/Director James Gunn reached into the bag of proven formulaic family centred action-sci-fi-adventure film tricks for this one and it certainly paid off. Filled with humour, action sequences and team member banter that made us love The Avengers, Guardians is a fun filled ride that also reminds one of summer blockbusters of yore – Indiana Jones and the (insert your favourite one) and Star Wars (insert your favourite episode) amongst others. We get a cocky thief, blue and green humanoids, a talking space-gun wielding Raccoon, a muscle of a tree, a spaceship chase, a prison break, a planet invasion and a super-powerful orb that everyone wants. Sounds familiar? Again, we don’t care ‘cos Guardians is the stuff that summer blockbusters are made of and we like it that way. Amen.

Guardians of the Galaxy features an ensemble cast and great music from the 60s & 70s. It has grossed $772.5m at the box office making it the second highest grossing film of the year.

The Maze Runner

Gripping stuff! Lord of the Flies meets sci-fi is all I can say. If you loved the book and love sci-fi, go see this one. The reason I ranked it higher than all the other dystopian-teen-films-based-on-a-series-of-books is that it was really gripping. Never overreaching and overly grandiose to the point of eye-rolling as in the case of The Hunger Games films, The Maze Runner doles out the right amounts of suspense and mystery to keep you guessing and glued to the screen. What or who is responsible for The Maze? What are those deadly creatures that inhabit The Maze? Is it all a big test? Should the boys just live with their allocated lot and degree of contentedness that they have or do they strive for a meaning, an explanation, for freedom?

The Maze Runner is directed by Wes Ball and stars Dylan O’Brien, Kaya, Thomas Brodie-Sangster, Will Poulter, Ki Hong Lee and Aml Ameen. It grossed $339m on its $34m budget.

The Giver

Again, one of the many films to come out this year about a dystopian future and based on a best-selling series of books for older children and young adults, The Giver sets itself apart.

There’s no elaborate explanation as to the reason for the adoption of “Sameness” by the new society and this which many may see as a negative, is for me the plus in the cluster of reasons offered by similar films. Who cares what caused/created the dystopia? The Giver deals with the removal of harmful knowledge and the suppression of properly undefined emotion in order for society to flourish.

What sets The Giver apart from the pack is its simplicity, storytelling, great acting and overall feel-good emotions it evokes. Watch out for the song Ordinary Human by One Republic.

The Giver is directed by Philip Noyce and stars Brenton Thwaites, Jeff Bridges, Meryl Streep, Katie Holmes, Alexander Skarsgard, Odeya Rush, Cameron Monaghan and Taylor Swift.It grossed $65m at the box office.

Locke

The entire film takes place inside a BMW X5 as it carries its sole occupant, its driver Tom Hardy as Ivan Locke down the M1. Tom Hardy gives a powerful performance that takes us along for the ride as we become voyeurs into the troubles that beset him as a married father and construction foreman on the eve of the biggest project of his life and how he goes about trying to resolve these issues one phone call at a time.

Compelling is the one word that describes Locke. Its premise, cinematography, script are all strong but it’s the acting that seals the deal as one of my best films for the year.

Loved by the critics, and with a limited release Locke grossed $5m on a budget of less than $2m.

Interstellar – Warning: Lazy viewers may get left behind on Earth

Christopher Nolan’s long awaited Interstellar in most ways did not disappoint; I mean what were we expecting really? Although it was tortuously long and left people scratching their heads a little and googling “space-time continuum” and “black holes”, it was a thrilling ride. The cinematography left me puzzled, I had expected something much more dazzling but it was not to be as I was forced to listen, pay attention and apply what little advanced physics that I could remember so as to not get left behind.

In the end Interstellar required that powerful acting that Matthew McConaughey could provide and although interstellar travel may not be possible in our life time, we sure got a great glimpse of it!

Interstellar grossed $641,387,217 at the box office making it the 9th highest grosser of the year.

Didn’t see a film you’d have liked in the Top 10? Check out lists below:

The next 10 are as follows:

    

    11.   Once Upon a Time in Shanghai

    12.   Divergent

    13.   Maleficent

    14.   X-Men: Days of Future Past

    15.   Snowpiercer

    16.   Into the Storm

    17.   Stonehearst Asylum

    18.   Gone Girl (Most Annoying Film of the Year Award)

I approached Gone Girl with a lot of anticipation. From earlier feedback some people liked it with talk of awards and honours, while some people did not. So I prepared myself for either eventuality. In the end, Gone Girl was a good film but very annoying. The two WTF moments cancelled each other out and in the end Gone Girl was just a gimmick, an exercise in cinematic masturbation with zero climax (yes, I will admit I was one of those that went on a Twitter rant at the end of the film)! Gone Girl tried to replicate (the endings of) films like Primal Fear but sadly fell short. However, perhaps the only good point of the film was Rosamund Pike’s great performance as Amy; she literally acted Ben-I-really-cannot-act-Affleck under the table. If you’re a masochist, you’ll love Gone Girl, if not you’ll probably just get pissed.

Gone Girl also features Neil Patrick Harris and Tyler Perry and is directed by David Fincher. It has grossed $356.4m at the box office.

    19. Dracula Untold (The Hope is Not Yet Lost Award for an Actor in a Film Award)

    20. Young Ones

And...

    21. Noah
    22. The Raid 2: Redemption

    23. Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit

    24. November Man

    25. Walk of Shame

    26. 13 Sins

    27. Sex Tape

    28. The Grand Budapest Hotel

    29. The Hundred-Foot Journey

    30. Think Like A Man Too

    

   

And bringing up the rear….

    31. A Million Ways to Die in the West
    32. Three Days To Kill

    33. Robocop
    34. The Expendables 3
    35. A Walk Amongst The Tombstones

    36. Godzilla (The Waste of Good Acting Talent in a Film Award)

    37. Penguins of Madagascar

    38. Non Stop

    39. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

    40. The Purge: Anarchy

    41. Lucy

    42. Tammy

    43. That Awkward Moment

    44. The Amazing Spider Man 2

    45. Automata

    46. The Lego Movie (The Most Over-hyped Film of the Year Award)

    47. Transformers: Age of Extinction

As usual Michael Bay gets away with this. Transformers: Age of Extinction is by no means the worst of the franchise but it’s only just a step away from Revenge of the Fallen. Mark Wahlberg replaced Shia LaBeouf as the fast talking human ally of the Autobots in this one but this recasting is not enough to misdirect our eyes to the noise, abysmal editing, plot holes and overall incongruity of the film (it took me 7 days to finish). But hey, what do I know? Age of Extinction is the highest grossing film of the year having made $1.087bn worldwide, thanks to the Chinese.

   48. I, Frankenstein (The Waste of Marketing Spend on a Film Award)

   49. Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (Most Disappointing Film of the Year Award)

   50. Neighbours (The Waste of Viewers’ Time and Money Film of the Year Award)

Phew!

So there you have it. It was a great year for sci-fi and dystopian film genres. We loved it and I am looking forward to what 2015 may bring.

Do you have a few questions or are you dissatisfied with the list? Argue in the comments section below.

Thanks for reading. Do share. J

Prose: Eloho

“Sooo long…bitch you did me so wrong!

 I don’t wanna go on,

Livin’ in this world without you!”

                                - Marshall Mathers

Each time Eloho played Eminem’s The Marshall Mathers LP album his mind would go back to that day, that day when everything changed. Whether for good or bad he was never sure. Some would argue that it was for good, others would have taken the contrary position. But what was done was done, and did he have any regrets? He most definitely did.

It was his last day before going back to school at the University of Benin aka Uniben. The localised strike had just been called off so his two week “break” was over. The school had been shut down over an industrial action carried out by the non-teaching staff who as usual were clamouring for one benefit or the other. He was tired of it all and after staying idly in school for two weeks he had gone home to Lagos. He did not understand why lectures had to be affected really but after a week of non-teaching support the lecturers had simply not turned up. Who was going to maintain the classrooms, clean the lavatories and carry out the other more serious admin roles in the school? It was a good reason to go home and he took it.

He had things to do, friends to see and things to catch up on. Inasmuch as his school was his pride and joy, Benin offered little comparatively to the action of Lagos. So his two weeks had been spent eating free food from his mum’s kitchen, watching movies and visiting friends. One friend in particular was important to him – Henrietta. Henrietta or Henri was his girlfriend of two years and he was totally in love with her. They had met while they were both waiting for admission into the university, during that period people called “University of House”, the one year between graduation from secondary school to university admission. For some more unfortunate, it took longer than a year, sometimes even up to four years - JAMB and O-Level exams were not known for their lack of difficulty.

For him it had been love at first sight. For her, a gradual coming into love as some teenage girls are wont to do.  They had been together for two years save for a brief breakup when they both ended up in different schools. She had gone to Lagos, University of Lagos (Unilag) and so they thought the best thing to do was to break up given the long distance. But after a semester apart one missed the other so much that they decided to make it work, and try they did. The past year things had been great given the time apart and they made up for it with long phone calls and even longer letters. The phone calls were murder on the pocket for him, but hey true love comes at a price, he told himself. 

So during this break period he had tried to see her as often as possible given her classes, three times so far. Just because his school’s non-academic staff were on strike did not suddenly mean that the rest of the country’s ivory towers would grind to a halt as well.

Eloho had had some last minute running around to do which involved picking up a few items and stopping by at Unilag to say his goodbyes to his friends and his babe Henri. He took a bus to Yaba Bus Stop and from there got on the Unilag campus bus shuttle service. Once on campus he located his bosom buddy's room. Pedro shared a BQ (Boys’ Quarters) room with a classmate in the senior staff quarters. Eloho had settled down and after the usual pleasantries had produced a bootleg copy of Eminem’s The Marshal Mathers LP. The other two guys in the room went nuts. The whole world had been waiting for Eminem aka Slim Shady real name Marshal Mathers to release his sophomore effort. His first album The Slim Shady LP was ill! For a white dude, Eminem could rap…his flow, word play, punch lines, and pop culture references were out of this world. He had given the established rap stars a run for their money and the rap and hip-hop community and indeed the world had taken notice of this white boy from Detroit.

“Eloho! How?! Where did you get this from?!”

Eloho grinned. “I know a guy.”

Pedro snatched the CD from his hand and began to scrutinise it.

“I picked it up from my audio CD guy on my way here. He said it just came to the market and this was one of the few copies available”, Eloho continued.

“Have you sampled it?”

“No, not really, I just listened to the intro and The Real Slim Shady track on my Discman. I was waiting for you guys.”

Pedro’s roommate, Chinedu boomed, “Abeg, let’s jam this CD!!!”

The white disc with the reverse “E” was slot into one of the trays of the Philips 3-loader VCD/CD player.

“This is a Public Service Announcement brought to you….”

Over an hour later the three boys were numb with awe. What had they just listened to? The Marshal Mathers LP was a couple of light years ahead of Em’s first album. Where he had been psychotically petulant in a white boy but brilliant rap way in The Slim Shady LP, Em had matured greatly, successfully transforming the previous drug related theme into one of seething rap rage against the success the machine had brought him. Where he had attacked himself, his mum and his wife in the first album, in this effort he attacked everyone else while going up quite a few more notches in his attacks to his mum and wife.

The trio were speechless. They had listened to Stan almost ten times. The message was one for the ages, who else had come close? The entire album was one giant pulsating middle finger but the craft and skill were undeniable.

With that album echoing in their ears, Eloho and Pedro walked towards Henri’s hall of residence hoping to get a cab. Eloho had just one more stop to make before heading home. He was going to see his girl and kiss her goodbye.

Moremi Hall was the premier female hall of residence in Unilag. For one to have entered even for five minutes was a feat not many guys could boast of. The supposedly finest and “it” Unilag girls lived there. Eloho did not get what the fuss was all about really. In his school, the “it” girls nay students lived not in the halls of residence but in the senior staff quarters or off campus in privately owned hostels that were mostly co-ed. But the standing of Moremi Hall was not fully lost on him. The kind of girls that walked in and out of that place would turn heads in his school. The women were fine, all of them. So it was with a sense of pride that he acknowledged the fact that his babe lived there. She was up there with the school’s top percentile of babes.

Eloho and Pedro got out of the cab they had taken from the beginning of Pedro’s street. It was about 7pm and the car park was already getting filled up with boys in their own or their parents’ cars. What a show! Eloho thought to himself. These kids really knew how to separate the classes and he was not referring to the years. Uniben had rich kids and there were students from different backgrounds and classes but it was never exhibited deliberately nor obnoxiously like it was done in Unilag. No wonder a lot of these kids have complexes, he thought. He spotted a smallish girl in the smallest pair of shorts he had ever seen standing next to a guy fully kitted in a sweatshirt, baggy jeans, a baseball hat and bat to boot. Hip hop lives!!!

The two friends walked into Moremi Hall and headed for Block C. Eloho had told Henri that he would be coming so he was sure that she would be in. They climbed up two flights of stairs and walked down the corridor to the right. He could find his way to her room blindfolded. They stopped in front of 208 and knocked. He hoped that her room would not be too full today. Moremi Hall was hopelessly crowded with a 4-woman room becoming a 10-woman one. The porters turned a blind eye to the rules and deep pockets to the squatters as demand far exceeded supply. Who no wan be Moremi babe?

A tall dark girl with a screaming white towel walked past him as he waited. She was quite pretty and the towel only outlined her lovely physique. Eloho and Pedro smiled to each other with a knowing look. That was the thing, there were so many beautiful women in the world, both in Lagos and in Benin but he had eyes for only one. No one could match his babe. Henri was that chocolatey brown skin, slender, with the loveliest almond-shaped eyes and a girl’s body that had grown into and wore its womanhood proudly. She was pretty and people were beginning to notice. But Eloho did not care; he had no fear for she was his. He recalled their many walks in their first year, the endless telephone calls, the hours of fevered making out. He had found someone he could be with. There was never a “just there” moment for every second was golden. He loved her and she loved him. Their relationship was near perfect, it was only the long distance that plagued it.

“Who is it?” a girl asked from within.

“Hi, I’d like to see Henrietta please.”

There was a cough then footsteps. The door was opened by one of Henri’s roommates. Eloho could not remember her name so he just smiled and said hi. Roommate smiled back at him. “Hi, is Henrietta in?” The roommate pulled her head away and looked back into the room. After receiving the go-ahead from Henri, the roommate allowed them in.

Eloho stepped into the room with Pedro right behind him and spotted Henri sitting on her bunk at the far side of the room. As they navigated to her bunk while saying hello to the other women in the room, he noticed that there was a guy sitting in Henri’s bunk. A slight frown came to his face but it was quickly gone when Henri walked up to him.

“Hi,” Eloho greeted Henri with a smile.

Henri smiled back and returned his greeting.

“I hope I’m not too late?”

“No, it’s ok; I just got in from class not too long ago.”

Pedro coughed.

“Oh Pedro hi, I didn’t see you there.” Henri said with a wave.

Pedro waved back.

Eloho looked at the guy seated on Henri’s bed. The dude was portly but tall about his height. Then he remembered him. What was that his name again? Uche. Yeah he had first met him at Henri’s best friend’s birthday party. Then he had met him again at a beach thing Henri had taken him to. Eloho had even spotted him driving down Henri’s street as he left her house during the last semester break. Hmmm…what was going on here?

“Eloho you remember Uche?” Henri said by way of introduction.

“Guy how far?” Eloho greeted.

“Nothing much” Uche responded.

Pedro just waved.

“Look guys, let me check on someone in 311. I’ll be back in a bit.” Pedro exited.

Eloho checked his watch. It was getting late and he did not have much time. He had one more stop to make before heading home.

He took Henri’s hand and pulled her, “Look I can’t stay long. Can we talk outside?”

Eloho walked out to the corridor as Henri spoke briefly to her other guest. She soon joined him.

“What’s up with this Uche guy?” he asked.

“Who Uche? He’s just a friend.”

“Really? Does he stop by often?”

“No, not really. Just once in a while.”

“Really? But I know that he doesn't go to school here.”

“Yeah but you know Tope in my class? Well he’s good friends with Uche. That’s how I met him. He gives some of us a lift sometimes.”

“Okay.”

Eloho was tired. It had been a long day and he wasn't really there to fight. He just wanted to spend a few precious moments with his girl before he left for school the next day.

“I've missed you.”

“I missed you too.”

He looked into her eyes and all the apprehension and suspicion disappeared. They talked for a while, about twenty minutes. Saying whatever lovers say to each other at moments like these. Uche did not come out of the room.

“Which kain guy be dis?” Eloho thought to himself. “Can’t he use his church mind and take his leave?” He really had not expected to be standing on the corridor talking to his girlfriend for this long. The Bro Code demanded that Uche having been deferred to initially would politely take his leave after a couple of minutes if not immediately. The guy had obviously not been schooled properly. These “Lag” boys sef! But wait o, dude was not even in the school!

A few minutes later Pedro returned and found both of them talking on the corridor. Strange. Well maybe they wanted to whisper sweet nothings to each other and did not want others overhearing. Pedro kept a respectable distance, waving and saying hi to the odd girl who passed by that he knew.

Eloho was a bit disappointed. He wanted their parting to be extra-special but apparently it could not be helped. Time was going and he had to be on his way.

“I got to go.”

Henri sighed a little. “Okay, let me see you off then.”

Eloho made to go but turned and poked his head into Henri’s room.

“I’m off,” he said to her roommates.

“Bye!!!” they chorused.

“Chief, I’m off.”

Uche just nodded and smiled at him.

Was that a sneer? Eloho wondered. Nah! His mind was playing tricks on him. Dude was harmless. Henri loved him and no one was going to change that.

The three of them walked to the gates of Moremi. Pedro gave them space as the two love birds stood talking. He expected them to spend a few more minutes for Eloho and Henri were known among their friends for their long goodbyes. Not this time.

“Pedro, I’ll see you later,” Henri said as she turned and walked back into her hostel.

Eloho followed her with his eyes.

“What was that bro?”

“I don’t know o. I wanted to hug and kiss her goodbye and she said no.” Eloho said with some surprise in his voice.

“Really?!” Pedro laughed.

Eloho looked at Pedro. “Yeah, she said she’s shy, you know PDA and all.”

Pedro looked at his friend, “Would this be your first time of hugging her goodbye here?”

The answer was no.

“Look Eloho I’ve seen that guy quite a few times with Henri oh, forming picking her up and dropping her off. You never know but I don’t trust that dude!”

Eloho turned and began to walk away slowly. He was confused; this was not the Henri he knew. Why was she acting strangely? He looked around the car park. Rich kids in their cars and co-eds. He spotted the small pretty girl with her hip-hop boyfriend. He closed his eyes and the events of the last hour or so flashed through his mind. He stood still for a good ten seconds with his eyes closed. When he opened them, he saw red.

Eloho walked up to Mr. Hip-Hop.

“Homez can I borrow your bat for one second please?”

Eloho took the offered bat and headed back into Moremi.

“Eloho wait!!”

“All is fair in love and war.” Those were the words in his ears as he bounded up to room 208. This time he did not knock but opened the door himself. He saw Henri laughing at something funny Porky Pig had said. In four steps he was across the room baseball bat in hand. Roommates made way while Henri and Uche only noticed him at the last moment getting up at the same time.

“Eloho what are doing?!”

“Henri step aside please.”

Henrietta nimbly moved aside as Uche tried to look for a way out. No luck. However Uche’s frantic movements were misconstrued as aggressive as Eloho somehow swung the bat within the tight confines of the room hitting Uche hard on the arm.

Crack! Uche yelled in pain grabbing his arm.

Henrietta screamed.

“Eloho stop!!!"

“No, it’s okay, I just want to ask him a few questions. Ehen, Chief, what exactly are you doing with my girl? Shey you know we are going out….as in we are in an exclusive relationship, dating and all?”

Uche did not answer but glowered in pain.

“You don’t want to answer now abi; you’re forming bad guy?” Eloho ran the bat into Uche’s midsection. As Uche bent over in pain Eloho smashed the bat across his face.

Blood spewed forth.

Henrietta screamed.

The roommates ran out of the room. Pedro ran in and tried to restrain his friend. He had never seen Eloho like this before.

“Eloho please stop! Please!” Henrietta begged.

Eloho turned to look at Henrietta. He dropped the baseball bat and walked towards her as she stood shaking. He reached out for her and she shrank back afraid.

Eloho smiled at her wryly, “I would never ever hurt you Henri. But I needed to teach him a lesson. I couldn’t just stand there and watch him steal you away.” Eloho looked down at the groaning Uche. “He would have if I had done nothing.”

Tears came to Eloho’s eyes and Henri’s heart melted. She grabbed him and held him tight.

“I love you so much Eloho. I swear I do!”

“I love you too Henri,” Eloho responded as they held each other tight as voices of authority approached.

This was the way it was meant to be. Two hearts, first love, forever love.

*********************************************

“Eloho! Eloho!!” Pedro called.

Eloho opened his eyes.

“Did you hear what I just said? He comes around campus with Tope but he’s definitely interested in Henri. I’ve seen them together a few times.”

Eloho shook his head. 

“Nah, it’s cool. She says they are just friends and he’s just being helpful. She can have friends can’t she?”

“Really?”

“Yeah, really! I trust Henri.”

“Okay cool, no problem then.”

“Bro I have to head. I’ll see you when next I'm around.”

The two friends hugged each other goodbye.

Eloho got into the cab that would take him to the university gate and from there he would find his way home. Discman in hand, he began to listen to Kim as the taxi carried him and three others to the gate. He would return to Unilag a few more times but that was the last time he would step into Moremi Hall.

Prose: I Love You, Always

“Loved you yesterday,

Love you still,

Always have, Always will.”

-          Anon

Tonye cruised along Ozumba Mbadiwe Avenue; it was about 8:45pm and the traffic was light that Wednesday evening given the time of day. It had been a hectic day at work at Blue Moon Ad Agency or BMAd as people liked to call it. With a deadline to meet it had been a series of back-and-forth since Friday when the client had dropped an ad-hoc request on them, no notice, no elbow room, nothing. Well he was glad it was over, at least until the next “kati-kati-kati” as he liked to call these unplanned emergency briefs. He looked ahead at the traffic lights as they began to change from green to red. He was two cars away from the intersection. Should he stop or try to beat the lights? He decided on the former, there was no rush. He slowed to a stop as the car in front of him raced on. He looked to his right and saw a construction truck accelerating down the perpendicular Adetokunbo Ademola Street hurrying to beat that ever so quickly changing traffic light.

He turned his head to the left toward the beautifully lit Civic Centre and as he did so he heard the sound of the SUV’s engine and then the screeching of its brakes as it ploughed into his Toyota Corolla from behind. The next thing he knew he was being pushed onto the path of the oncoming construction truck. His foot had been on the brakes and the car in neutral but the brakes of the Corolla were no match for the SUV’s force. The truck hit the right fender of his car and sent it spinning out of control. Tonye said a silent prayer as his body was sent spinning at the same speed and force as his car. He willed the car to stop and just when it seemed that it would he felt another forceful jolt as another car rammed into him. The next thing he saw was blackness.

***************************************

“Tonye”. The voice was familiar.

“Tonye”. He knew that voice. It was female and very reassuring, full of love and earnest hope.

“Tonye”, she called him again.

He opened his eyes and looked up. It was Ifeoma looking down at him as he lay there. She had a look of worry mixed with relief on her face. He tried to smile but immediately felt a bolt of pain everywhere. He tried to call her name as he blacked out.

***************************************

Tonye heard quiet voices. They seemed far away but he guessed that they were nearby. He tried to determine the speakers but could not. Was Ifeoma one of the speakers? He lay still and tried to listen.

“He’ll be fine eventually.”

“Please sir, help him!”

“Don’t worry madam, we’re doing our best and he’ll be well in no time and back to his feet in a few months with the proper physiotherapy.”

That must be the doctor, Tonye said to himself. They must be talking about him. He tried to open his eyes but the light was too bright. A small groan escaped him as he passed out again.

***************************************

“Tonye, Tonye you have to wake up.” It was Ifeoma. “You have to! Stop lying down here feeling sorry for yourself. Everyone is worried because you haven’t woken up.” He felt tired. He needed to sleep some more. Ifeoma should leave him alone. He tried to fall deeper into the depths of sleep-filled bliss.

“Tonye! It’s been three days since the battle to save your life! Wake up my friend!!!” Ifeoma clapped her hands at him and his eyes sprung open. Instinctively he shut them against the bright lights. A throbbing pain erupted in his head. He slowly opened his eyes as the ceiling lights came into view. He lay still for a bit until his eyes grew accustomed to the brightness. He perceived the slight smell of bleach and disinfectant. Yup, definitely a hospital. He moved his eyes around and noticed that his left leg was in a cast and elevated in traction. His head was bandaged and he felt pain on the left side of his body. He grunted and breathed slowly to ease it. He looked around for Ifeoma but she was not in his room. He noticed a clock on the wall. A quarter past nine; but he could not tell whether it was daytime or night time. She should be here waiting for him to wake up or wasn’t she the one that woke him up? He took in his surroundings. He was the only one in the recovery room as the second bed was bare.  He waited. Someone would come soon he thought -  the doctor, a nurse or Ifeoma.

“Ah! Mr. Tonye! You’re awake! Praise be to God Almighty!!” 

Tonye looked to the door, it was a nurse. 

“How are you feeling?” 

He tried to smile. The nurse prodded and checked the dials and monitors and clucked in satisfaction. 

“Let me go and get Dr. Alabi.”

Dr. Alabi was an efficient looking man with a kind disposition. He looked like he knew what he was doing.

“Ah! Tonye, it’s good to have you back. You had us worried for a minute. How do you feel?” 

Tonye tried to speak and his voice came out in a raspy tone. “Matron, please give the patient a sip of water”, the doctor directed. Tonye sipped some water from the offered plastic cup.

“Tired, weak. What happened?” Tonye asked.

“All in good time but you are very fortunate. Thank God for saving you because it could have been much worse.” Tonye closed his eyes as he recalled the screaming of brakes.

“Your internal injuries are healing nicely and you are responding to treatment. The pains and occasional numbness should ease in time. You’re a fit young man and so your body should recover very nicely.” Tonye glance at his leg. 

“Yes, you suffered a multiple fracture on your left leg caused by the second impact, but we’ve set it and put it in a cast. You’ll require a few sessions of physiotherapy once it has healed nicely.” Dr. Alabi offered by way of explanation.

“Again you are a very lucky man. Lucky to be alive; very few people would have survived that bad accident. So give thanks to God.”

Tonye closed his eyes and said a brief prayer of thanksgiving to the Almighty. He opened his eyes and wondered where Ifeoma was. Why wasn’t she here?

As if reading his mind Dr. Alabi said, “Your wife had to go home to rest. She had been here since Wednesday night, for four days. Once we knew you were out of the woods we asked her to go get some rest. We didn’t want her breaking down too.”

Tonye nodded in understanding and closed his eyes. Sleep called.

“Ok young man. We’ll see you tomorrow morning. Matron will check up on you all through the night to make sure you are okay.” Tonye smiled his thanks and fell asleep as Dr. Alabi walked out.

********************************

Tonye opened his eyes slowly as he became fully awake. His eyes hit the clock on the wall. It was 9 o’clock. A.M. he guessed. He looked around the room. The room was empty but there was a woman’s handbag on the chair next to his bed. He looked to the door and he could just make out a woman’s frame through the frosted glass. She seemed to be talking to a doctor. He waited. He suddenly felt sorry for Ifeoma. The whole experience must have been hard and traumatic for her, much more than it must have been for him as he had been blissfully unconscious throughout the ordeal of patching him up. He strained to catch what they said.

“So you’d have to take it easy on him. He should be discharged in a couple of weeks after his injuries have healed nicely. The stitches on his face will be removed in a couple of days or so. Thank God he’s recovered from the concussion, his vitals are almost normal but I think we might have to wait until he can talk well before we give the final thumbs up. And yes, he will have to undergo physiotherapy when his leg is healed. So in all let’s say six to eight weeks.”

Tonye raised his right hand to touch his face. He winced a little as he felt the smarting of his flesh. He continued and traced the outline of the facial stiches on his left temple down to his cheek. Hmmm….Scarface. He then tried to wriggle his toes; those on his right feet responded and the ones on his raised left leg managed a slight response. He then closed his eyes and tried to feel out his entire body, telekinetically testing his parts and organs. 

He opened his eyes and looked at Ifeoma. He could only make out what seemed to be her brown bubu dress. He smiled to himself; that brown bubu dress that she saved for trips to the market or whenever she couldn’t really be bothered with the way she looked. But like he had always told her, the bubu did little to hide her beauty and incredible sexiness. It only made him think of what was underneath it. He felt a faint stirring. He said a quick prayer of thanks as that department seemed to be fine.

He couldn’t wait to go home and to get back to work. He wondered how the office would cope without him. Sola and Vivian could manage he thought, and they could always reach him if they needed him.

“Ah! Mummy! Daddy! Welcome!”

“How is he?” “How is my son?”

“He is recovering very nicely. He regained consciousness last night but now he’s sleeping.”

“Where is he? Can we see him?”

“Of course, we were just waiting for him to wake up.”

It seemed his parents were here. Tonye was sure his mother’s prayers had been what kept him from the bear hug of death. His mother did not joke with her prayers, neither did she joke with her children.

“Shall we go in?” Dr. Alabi said.

Tonye reached for the overhead handle and pulled himself up to a more upright position. He had to look strong for all their sakes, lest they continue to worry. He hoped he looked okay and not too bad. He could not wait to see those who loved him so much, those whose love he craved and needed as much as a drowning man needed air. Their love had made him strong, given him hope and crafted him into the man that he was, the man he needed to be. His parents and his darling wife Ifeoma - Ifeoma that he had loved from the first time he saw her sitting in that classroom all those years ago on the first day of their JAMB lessons. She had become his best friend, his confidante, his girlfriend and then his soul mate. Theirs had been a long and passionate relationship, with the ups and downs and verve that came with young love. It had not been easy but it had been worth it, every nanosecond. She made him happy, like he was the only man on earth and for his part he did his best to keep her on that pedestal that he had placed her on since the first day they met. He hoped he had not frightened her too much. She was tough but he did not like her to be pushed.

His family walked in led by Dr. Alabi.

Tonye smiled as much as he could manage. His mother already had some tears in her eyes as she reached for him gently, “Tonye, how are you?” His father was far more stoic as he walked to his bedside and took his hand. “Son, we thank God.”

Tonye smiled at his parents and then turned his head to see Ifeoma. She stood there before him with tears in her eyes. Tonye had tears in his eyes as well and he blinked to get rid of them.

“Sade, come and hug your husband and let us thank God for his life”, his mother said.

Suddenly, Tonye did not recognise his wife. This was not Ifeoma.

“Who are you?” Tonye said in a raspy voice. “Where is Ifeoma?”

***********************************

Tonye stood in the drizzling rain and looked down at the gravestone before him. He had been standing there for about five minutes trying to make sense of it all. He read and re-read the words engraved on the stone.

Ifeoma Okafor

June 16, 1980 – July 23, 2008

Loving daughter, blessed child

Go with God.

After a while, Tonye limped, cane in hand, towards the car where Sade sat patiently waiting.

There is this girl....

There is this girl. The girl in my dreams. I have never met her or spoken to her but I know that I have seen her and she has seen me and only from a distance. Looking back now I am sure the first time we met was long ago, when I was a kid. But who she is exactly, I am not sure. Over the years I have seen her in other women, bits of her in other girls. Like in the little three year old girl I met at a mutual family friend’s house all those years ago. The little girl who cried when she had to leave me. She threw a massive tantrum and we ended up going with her to her house just to stop the crying. The mothers laughed and made jokes that my three year old mind could not understand. The next time I saw her I was older, 11 to be precise; and it was the last day of primary school and I saw her in my classmate Ada. Ada and I had spent many days together after school doing our homework and keeping each other company until our not-so-prompt parents came to get us from school. She was easily my best friend when it was un-cool for boys and girls to be so. But this is not about Ada; it is about the girl, the girl I saw in Ada when a group of us boys had badgered her into telling the identity of the one boy she really liked in class. Names were called and each time she said “No”. A few of the boys, confident with themselves even mentioned their own names. She laughed and still said “No.” She looked at me at one point, I think daring me to ask if it was me. It was at that moment I saw her again. I never opened my mouth and the one o’clock bell rang.

Being a teenager was more about books than dreaming so I did not see her much; just those rare times where I would see her in my early morning dreams. Saw a bit of her at 17, in a girl I fell in love with. Then a whole lot of her in another girl I fell in love with at 20. Janet did not love me back for another 4 years but when she did I hardly saw her any more, the girl in my dreams that is. I stopped believing in her and admitted to myself that she was not real, and did not exist.

So it was a surprise when one day a few years later, from the corner of my eye, I saw her looking at me. I turned to look at her properly but she was gone. This would happen once in a while. I have tried to put a face to her but it comes to me in snatches of articulation, very briefly like smoke fading away. I would close my eyes and try to remember, to picture her face, her body, her form. Sometimes it would be clear as day but as soon as I would open my eyes it would disappear. I see her sometimes in music videos, silent soul siren with the fizzy hair or curls; in prose, witty conversation and in silent avatars. She is there.

I am convinced she is just a figment of my imagination or a part of my psyche that had been manifested in this way. Perhaps I knew her in another life as a veritable part of me. Or perhaps she is my guardian angel watching over me, a protector. Maybe she is death herself just checking up on me until that appointed day. I may live many many more years, I really do not expect her to be real or to emerge from the shadows or to one day fully become a woman that I would actually meet. But I do know that when the time comes for me to cross from this life to another, on the day death comes for me, the girl in my dreams will be with me, holding my hand, walking in love with me. Of this, I have no doubt.