Does it Matter Where I Work?

Okay so over the weekend  I got invited to my old friend Tony’s soiree. I had nothing to do and figured it would be a good idea to go mix with people and enjoy an evening of small chops, drinks and nice conversation, plus Tony really knows how to throw these things. These objectives were achieved with the added benefit of food for thought that inspired this article.

I got there an hour late and met about 10 people with 3 of us being guys. So my first conversation was with a group of three women. I introduced myself and they did as well and one of them quickly asked, “Are you Tony’s colleague?”I responded in the negative and the conversation petered out almost as soon as it had began. 

I gravitated towards where the drinks were as any responsible young man would. Soon enough drink in hand I found myself seated with a young lady and we went through the introductions.

“Hi, I’m TJ.”

“Hello, my name is Anna.”

“Pleased to meet you Anna.”

“Same here…. Do you work with Tony?”

“No, I don’t.”

“Oh ok, so where do you work?”….

I told her and this time we spent some time in good conversation about our jobs and other things before we both had to go mingle with the now growing group.

I met a few old friends and acquaintances and we played catch up but at the back of my mind was why the two women I spoke to started by asking me whether I worked in the same office with Tony? It couldn't be a coincidence. I mean, to know where I worked it would have been easier to ask just that: “Where do you work?” or the generic “So what do you do?” which usually gives elbow room for vague responses. I had a hunch and it seemed to make small sense.

I encountered another girl at the small chops table and thankfully we just said hi and smiled at each other. But it happened again, the question: “Are you Tony’s colleague?” No way it was a coincidence. This time I just smiled and said no. After we got that out of the way, we talked for a long while as she regaled me with her mischievous antics as a teenager. It was fun really.

As I walked towards my car I smiled a knowing smile as I fully accepted my hunch. You see my friend Tony works in one of the well-known oil servicing companies. He lives in an estate with houses that price their rent at figures I could not afford even if my annual salary was tripled. He was single and maybe they thought I was. It made sense. So what if I had said “Yes, I do”, what would have happened I wonder? Would I have been accorded more civility by the first set of girls? The other two women were very cool but it was still odd that they would ask me that same specific question first. I wondered if the other guys in the room got the same question. I may never know.